I decided to take the blog down a different road today. Well, maybe that’s not as accurate as I’d like it to be. Adding another “dimension” is a better term. Or simply put I decided to write more stuff about nothing in particular and lots about those little particulars. What better way to work out my ideas and improve on my writing as well?
And so it begins, the endless parade of my thoughts and ideas in random order.
Lately I have been thinking about how we act towards other people as well as how we perceive the way they act. I have come to one conclusion and just to be clear it’s not the end of my conclusions, but it’s the basic beginning. I believe that most of what we do is based on selfishness. I know most people will disagree and start telling me that im completely wrong. I’ve lost my marbles, im a heretic, I should be hung by my toe nails, the list goes on. So just humor me a bit and hear me out.
Just as the great Gregory House is quoted weekly as saying…
(Season 1 Pilot)
Dr. House: Truth begins in lies. Think about it.Foreman (House leaves):That doesn’t mean anything, does it?
I will now add my own quote to the world at large.
R. K. Souliske – “Everyone is selfish – Nothing we do, does not begin without the smallest amount of selfishness”
The dictionary lists the definition of selfish as follows:
1. devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one’s own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others.
2. characterized by or manifesting concern or care only for oneself: selfish motives.
Everything we do usually has a motive or end desire. It’s just the way things are, even if we don’t want to admit it. We eat cause we are hungry. This is motivated by self-preservation and the need to sustain our bodies. This is selfish, a necessary selfishness but selfishness in and of itself. When we interact with people we are looking out for our selves even when we don’t realize it. When we act nice and caring ,even if we truly mean it, this is rooted selfishness as well. I know everyone just decided to stand up and throw their hands in the air.
“Oh no.. He did not just say what I thought he said… “
Yes I did. I said it. I took kindness and caring and equated them with selfishness. Let me explain it this way. When we are caring and nice we want to please the other person or care for them in some manner. This in turn makes us feel something. It gives us a sense of being and satisfaction. This is selfishness, we are getting something in return for our actions. If you do something and it gives you something enjoyable in return then you have done it to please yourself. Even if we do something begrudgingly we have done it out of self-serving motives. To make the other person stop bothering us, or to fulfill a sense of duty. Sometimes we do things just get it done and over with so we can the things we want to do. Do you see the pattern here? We do what we do cause it some how pleases us and fulfills us. If it didn’t we wouldn’t do it. Still not convinced?
Would you go outside and run naked through the streets?
Are you thinking that it’s because it would be shameful and embarrass you and others? Well then you are thinking selfishly. You are thinking based on how it affects you. You are motivated by your beliefs and morals and a sense of self-protection in the form of preventing embarrassment and shame.
So I’m not saying everything we do is completely 100% the dictionary definition of selfish, but I am saying our motives and the motives of others is always grounded in some way in the form of an expectation.
So whats my point?
Simple as we interact with others and we get angry, frustrated, or bewildered we can save ourselves a lot of grief if we step back and ask ourselves what is real the motive behind their actions. In turn we also need to look at our actions and motives and see if we are really going after our own self-interest? In most cases we will see that what we think is a righteous motive or pure intention is in reality self driven.
How does this make life easier? It doesn’t. It just gives us a way of evaluating or current situation. Let me give an example. You are in the middle of a political or religious debate and both sides are getting angry. Why do you think this is? Why is it hard to simply disagree and walk away?
Selfishness – both parties want to prove their point . If it wasnt self-serving then neither side would really care. If you have no interest in football you never find yourself in arguments over which team is better because you have no self motivated interest.
As usual this is just my thoughts on the subject. I’m neither trying to convince or disprove anything.